Vow Renewal: How To Get Started Writing Your Vows

writing vows
photo credit: incurable_hippie via photopin cc
writing vows
photo credit: incurable_hippie via photopin cc

Couples often choose to write their own vows when planning a vow renewal ceremony–after all, you’ve been through a lot together! However, experiencing “writer’s block” is not uncommon, but there’s plenty of ideas available for getting the creative juices flowing. You may also decide to recite your original vows, or make amendments to them. Whatever you decide, check out a few brainstorming ideas:

Writing Vows Together

Want to say the same custom vows to each other? You’ll have to write them together.

  • Schedule at least a two-hour block for writing
  • Print copies of vow writing exercises if desired
  • Work on the vows in separate rooms for at least 30 minutes
  • Switch papers or otherwise trade notes
  • Discuss the best parts of both sets of vows
  • Create a first draft of your combined ideas
  • Try a “dress rehearsal”–stand up, hold hands and recite the vows to see how it feels
  • Discuss your vows with your officiant, if applicable

Writing Vows Separately

Writing your vows separately? Check out these tips:

  • Set “ground rules,” such as how long they should be, what wording you want to include, etc.
  • Discuss ideas and take suggestions from your officiant if working with one

 Vow Writing Exercise

Print out two copies of the following questions and use them to help you and your hubby write your vows:

  • Do you want to use scriptures or other readings? Make copies of them or write them down, and think about what they mean to you and why
  • What about favorite song lyrics? Are there any that have special meaning to you as a couple?
  • Are there any special quotes that fit this event?
  • How about parts of other vows? Do you want to incorporate them into your own?

Use the Following Format to Get Started:

  • A heartfelt opening: “My dearest…”
  • 1st Paragraph: Talk about what your spouse means to you and your life
  • 2nd Paragraph: Discuss what your marriage has been. Include favorite memories and moments, talk about your children if applicable, holidays, times your spouse made you laugh, challenges you faced together, trying times and more.
  • 3rd Paragraph: Think about your hopes and dreams for the future, what turned out differently than you thought it would, what you don’t want to change, etc.
  • 4th Paragraph: Write your closing with words of thanks and love.

Good luck!


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