Marriage is about an emotional connection, community involvement, bringing new lives into the world, providing mental and physical security for both partners, maturing, and—perhaps most importantly—becoming better people. Those who have been married once before know that this isn’t always the reality though.
Conflicts that are ignored turn into bigger problems. And those bigger problems can grow into a divorce. From living situations to finances, there are many confrontations that can lead to a split. And that’s why it’s important to learn from your mistakes, making your second time around run a lot smoother than things did with the first.
Nixing the problems throughout the wedding planning process is where you can start your success this time. Talk about the big points before the vows are even exchanged. What’s first on the list?
Where will you live?
The To-Do List
Your post-wedding to-do list is likely going to be complicated enough without adding a residential situation to confuse things. You’ve got thank-you notes, wedding gifts, a honeymoon, returns, clean-up—the list goes on. Ideally, you want to cut the chores on this list down as much as possible beforehand, and that means finding a home first.
You and your partner should agree on your living situation and that may be the hardest part. But keep this in mind: rich or poor, where you start out as a married couple is unlikely to be where you end up. For this reason, many couples choose rentals.
Should you decide to rent, familiarize yourself with the local area. You also want to know your proclivities as a married couple. Some prefer the solitude of the mountains, some prefer the peace of the sea, and some want to be perpetually surrounded by some sprawling cityscape. Then again, some don’t have a choice and must rent where a property is available.
For example, Westend Apartments in downtown Denver has attracted a lot of newlywed couples due to its swanky style. Denver is a trendy town with a lot of opportunities and things to do; its population has expanded at a rate almost no one could have predicted! The area seems to be growing and offering up a lot of great choices in the rental market, it could be a worth a peek if you’re checking out new spaces for you and your spouse-to-be to start out in.
Denver is only an example though. With the right amount of research and time, you’ll be able to find something that fits your couple style either on the coast or in America’s heartland. You just have to sit down and talk about what your specific wants are as individuals and as a couple.
For those that want something more stylish, look into older cities with complexes that hold a bit of history. Or, for those that are looking for more amenities, New York (for example www.carmelapartments.com/15-cliff) is known for giving their residents ample amounts of “extras.”
Something else to consider is national agencies which feature properties across the country – especially if you get a job which forces you to move after the wedding, it’ll be better to be pre-approved. You can both hop on and check out your options quickly and easily without any fuss.
The best marriages can be hard even if they are successful, so prepare yourself. Create a list of “musts” that you have to consider before your wedding date even pops up. You’ll want your finances in order, you’ll want to talk about how you’ll be raising your kids and you’ll definitely want to decide on where you’ll be living before you decide on the design of your bridal bouquet.