Should I remarry if my future stepchildren hate me?


photo credit: lanier67 via photopin cc

Marriage is a big deal. It is not something you should rush into. You have to take time to find that special person you want in your life that you are ready and willing to stick with through the good and the bad.

Most people who have been divorced find it hard to remarry especially when there are stepchildren involved. They have been a countless number of cases where stepchildren do not like the future stepparent. They may even be opposed to the marriage.

Many people who are faced with this situation in most cases do not know what to do. They worry about what the future has in store for them as far as the relationship with the partner’s children is concerned. It is not uncommon for them to have doubts about the whole arrangement.

According to statistics 60% to 73% or remarriages that involve children are never easy. There are instances that the kids are openly hostile and do not hide that they are opposed to the union. A person who is in such a situation should expect a rough ride.

The question of whether one should go through with the marriage is not easy. There are several things that have to be put into account before this decision can be made. Your past relationship, the children, your future spouse, your relationships’ background and how you intend to set-up the household have to be scrutinized.

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149Blended families present multiple parenting challenges that have to be handled with great caution. A parent who is not prepared may find him or herself struggling to deal with power struggles and long-standing alliances. You will have to work hard if you plan to remarry and want to gain the approval of your stepchildren.

Overcoming the barriers and developing positive bonds with your new stepchildren may take time. The process will not be easy but if it works out the end results will be worth it. You will have to sincerely be interested in the kids. Spending time with them helps. Being positive and praising them when they do something good will contribute immensely to forging a good relationship.family1249

People who want to remarry are advised to seek professional help. Counseling before the marriage is important. It will help avoid frustration and failure. An experienced marriage-and-family therapist is in a good position to clarify and discuss any expectations, parenting styles and roles. These are all areas of focus that have to be analyzed and understood well for the marriage to work.

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