Remarriage Etiquette FAQs: The Wedding

second wedding etiquette
second wedding etiquette

Getting remarried and concerned about doing it “right”? Check out a few etiquette FAQs regarding second weddings, and remember, it’s your special day, so do what you want!

What’s the Etiquette For Announcing the Wedding?

If one or both of you have children, they should be the first to know. Tell your families next, and ex-spouses you have said children with. Then feel free to tell your friends….if getting married and recently widowed or divorced, you may opt to skip the official newspaper announcement. Engagement parties are appropriate, but you could choose to throw a less-formal affair at a bar or restaurant, or family home.

How About Registering for Gifts?

You probably have all the home stuff you require, but that doesn’t mean you can’t register! Register for things you need, or fun stuff such as camping equipment. Honeymoon registries are also appropriate, as are those that serve as donations to favorite charities. Whatever else, accept every present given to you graciously.

What About a Shower?

Again, you likely have the stuff you’d normally receive at a wedding shower, but that doesn’t mean you can’t get together with girlfriends for a special spa weekend or other adventure. You may also choose to take a class together or simply have a fun night out on the town!

Is it Okay to Wear White? Are Veils Okay Too?

Yes, white came to symbolize virginity and purity, but before that it was the color of celebration. If you feel “virginal white” is too much, think assorted off-white colors, such as cream hues, or any other color you like that complements skin tone. Think lavender and pink! As for veils, they still symbolize being “untouched,” so you might opt for a beautiful wide-brimmed hat or floral arrangement instead.

Can I Have Attendants?

Well, you definitely need witnesses for the signing of your marriage license! And while many second wedding parties aren’t as large as first ones, it’s still perfectly okay to have various friends and family members stand up there with you. You could also have your children stand with you if applicable.

Who Should Escort Me?

Should the thought of Dad giving you away the second time make you feel awkward, feel free to walk down the aisle by yourself. But if you really want your papa to do it, that’s fine too!

I Had a Huge, Formal First Wedding. Should My Second Be Low-Key?

If your first wedding was a big to-do, going the huge shindig route may remind you too much of the first time ’round. But if you eloped the first time or went to your city hall,  feel free to do it up right. And even if you did have a big formal wedding the first time, you can still do it the second!

How Do I Word My Invitations?

Parents are generally included in first-time wedding invites, since they’re the ones paying for the darn things. Second weddings are often funded by the couple, but you can still include your ‘rents. A good example is “Rebecca Baker Smith and Jonathan Simonsen together with their parents request the honor of your presence at their marriage etc.”

If you still go by your first married name, it’s appropriate to use it on the invitations.

Any Ideas For Including the Kids?

There’s tons of cool ways to incorporate your children into your second wedding ceremony. Have them escort you down the aisle, honor them as attendants, ask them to do readings, or consider going the family vow route. Sand ceremonies are another option. Whatever you decide to do, make sure the kids are comfortable in their respective roles and want to be involved. Forcing them into anything isn’t going to help!

Do We Have to Tell Our Exes?

If you have children with these people, yes, it’s usually a good idea. If not, you aren’t obligated to let them know, however if you’re still on good terms you may wish to alert them.






Suggested Posts

second wedding toast

Below is a sample wedding speech perfect for a couple getting married for the second time. Sample Toasts for Second Weddings Best Man Speech, Second Marriage for Bride and Groom My name is James, and on behalf of Matthew and Angie, I would like to thank you for attending this union today! I have the …

0 186.2k

Planning a destination affair for your second wedding? If new to the concept, keep in mind it can be a lot of work, but also very fun and rewarding. Whether getting hitched in Aspen, the Virgin Islands, or somewhere else in the world, keep the following do’s and don’ts in mind to ensure your wedding …

0 184.5k
dresses for vow renewal

We have already covered our favorite second wedding dresses from Ann Taylor in a recent post. The more time we spent on her website the more we thought that the Ann Taylor bridal collection really had some amazing dresses for vow renewals too. We’ve said it before that when it comes to vow renewals you …

1 188.5k

If you are chief bridesmaid for a bride to be who has been there, done that and got the t-shirt already it can feel like an impossible task trying to arrange a suitable hen party. After all you don’t want to be accused of making things too OTT with it being a second marriage but …

0 184.8k

Marrying a Widower Question: Need some advice. Marrying a widower in 8 weeks. His former in-laws (deceased wife’s parents) are deceased. The guest list includes her aunts, uncles, cousins. I’m thinking this is a bit extreme as he is not inviting the same for his blood family. Is there proper etiquette regarding this topic? HELP. …

0 185.3k
Floral Wedding Gowns

Whether it’s your vow renewal or the beginning of a marriage later in life, you deserve to feel like a bride. Taking your second-walk down the aisle can be stressful, but you’ll feel at ease in these gorgeous, floral-inspired wedding gowns! We are loving how this posh gown is sexy yet super sophisticated with its …

0 184.6k