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Inviting girl friend to my wifes memorial service

barrymichele
Novice

Post #1 of 2 (3040 views)

Inviting girl friend to my wifes memorial service

What is your feelings about inviting my girl friend to attend a memorial mass for my wifes first anniversary of her passing?

We both speak of our respective spouse's often and I have never and will never speak badly of hers even if what he did/didn't do agreed with me. My girl friend and I are in love with each other, but I want to know if the invitation is adviseable before I do it. I don't want to place her in an uncomfortable position if it is ill-advised. I will be offering her the option not to attend if she has any reservations.

emily4families
Novice

Post #2 of 2 (3022 views)

Re: [barrymichele] Inviting girl friend to my wifes memorial service [In reply to]

I was touched by what you wrote. What would it be like to offer an invitation from that place. Letting her know that you want her to know you'd like her there, and that you think it would be a good thing ... and at the same time wanting to respect her and not make her feel uncomfortable.

I see this as a wonderful way to further communicate and deepen your connection with each other. Instead of presuming how she'll feel about it, share your thoughts and feelings, and then be genuinely curious and interested about hers. That's what makes for a healthy friendship and relationship.

Look at it this way -- you're both beginners at this, having never done anything like this before, so you get to learn together what works for you and what does not.

Wishing you all the best.
Emily Bouchard, MSSW
Life Coach, Speaker, & Trainer
Author, "Conquering Conflict: Techniques and Strategies for Resolving Blended Family Conflict"