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Wedding after civil ceremony?

mandy5646
New User

Post #1 of 3 (2007 views)

Wedding after civil ceremony?

Last month I married the love of my life. The only problem is that we were kind of forced to get the legal part of it done in a hurry so that we could get custody of his daughter. The family judge told us on May 31 if we wanted custody we had to be married, so on June 7 we went to the courthouse. The judge married us with our parents by our sides (who are extremely supportive), but I wanted all of our friends and family to witness us getting married. Most of our extended family and old friends have no idea that we even got married. I'm unsure of what the proper etiquette is. Can I have a wedding even though we are already legally married? Do I get to wear a beautiful dress and have a bridal party? Can my dad walk me down the aisle and give me away... again? What about wording the invitations, and registering for gifts? I need some advice. Please help.

the_admin
Remarriage Forum Moderator / Moderator

Post #2 of 3 (2002 views)

Re: [mandy5646] Wedding after civil ceremony? [In reply to]

All of this is addressed in detail in the pages of this website But, since you are already married, you cannot be married again, sorry. You mention that some don't know you are married but, you know you are married and that what counts. You wouldn't want to begin your newly married life with a lie.

Sometimes we must make decisions and live by the ramifications of those decisions. However, it would be perfectly acceptable to host a wedding reception and celebrate the marriage or, if you are religious, have a blessing of the marriage in your place of worship. But, to host a gift giving event such as a wedding under false pretenses wouldn't be appropriate.

Please read and review past posts since we have addressed this issue many, many times.
I Do - Take Two Moderator

Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT

Post #3 of 3 (1999 views)

Re: [mandy5646] Wedding after civil ceremony? [In reply to]

I completely agree on all accounts.

A wedding is a wedding no matter what the ceremony is. And, typically when guests are invited to a wedding-like event when the couples is already married, they view it negatively, as if the couple just wants gifts and to dress up. So, it is best to treat your friends to a reception/party to celebrate your marriage and custody rights.
Rebecca Black, Etiquette Consultant
Etiquette Now
http://www.etiquettenow.com