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Redoing what I did for first wedding at second wedding

hopedelite
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Post #1 of 2 (575 views)

Redoing what I did for first wedding at second wedding

I designed my wedding ring set and the center stone was mine before the marriage. I absolutely love them. I loved most of my wedding dress, I loved my bridesmaid's dresses, I loved the colors. Here is my challenge. I am having a very hard time getting away from what I designed the first time. We really don't have the money for rings and everything. I have been looking at getting the stones reset, looking at dresses and so on. I keep coming back to a lot of what I did for my first wedding. Part of me feels like using the same bands, the top to my dress and getting the skirt that I want, using the same bridesmaid dresses and same colors, some of the same ideas over all. I realize how tacky this may sound. But, many people borrow and are given things for their weddings, isn't it like I am borrowing and giving to myself?

(This post was edited by the_admin on Apr 7, 2009, 9:59 PM)

Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT / Moderator

Post #2 of 2 (565 views)

Re: [hopedelite] Redoing what I did for first wedding at second wedding [In reply to]

Dear Hopedelite,

I think you know the answer already. As much as it may seem right and logical to use what worked, there was something that didn't work the first time around--wedding did, marriage didn't. So, "borrowing" from your previous wedding for your new marriage does send a negative message. It isn't just a subtle message, it is visual, which others might find, not only confusing, but awkward as well.

Using part of your dress and rings could work because you are altering them completely. But, to use the same, exact bridesmaids dresses is too similar. We don't create the same look for an encore wedding.

If you are hosting a wedding on the "cheap," you won't need multiple bridesmaids anyway, as yours should be informal. You could simply allow your MOH (only one) wear a nice cocktail dress of her choice.

Best wishes,
Rebecca Black, Etiquette Consultant
Etiquette Now
http://www.etiquettenow.com