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Is 5 years too soon to renew vows?

KrissyCo
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Post #1 of 3 (1655 views)

Is 5 years too soon to renew vows?

I was 21 when I got married to my husband, it hasn't even been a year yet (September 2nd, 2006 was our wedding date).. I had the worse wedding imaginable.

Without going into total detail, I basically choose nothing for my wedding (it was my mother-in-law that picked everything), my husband was drunk and had me in tears by the end of the night (while the guests were still there).. and it was all over a huge mess!

So I want to renew our vows.. I want a wedding that I picked out!

Is 5 years too early to do this? I just feel that i diserved a better wedding than what I got, and my husband agrees. However, I'm thinking 5 years isn't long enough?

Helpppp?

-Krissy

the_admin
Remarriage Forum Moderator / Moderator

Post #2 of 3 (1651 views)

Re: [KrissyCo] Is 5 years too soon to renew vows? [In reply to]

I'm sorry that your wedding was not what you had envisioned but there are no wedding do-overs; once you're married, you're married. There are no new chances at having another wedding. Note that a vow renewal is not a wedding. But, it can be a wonderful affirmation of a successful marriage.

Typically couples have vow renewals when they have a significant anniversary (10, 25, 50 years) or when they have had times of major adversity such as a separation, loss of a child or a serious illness.

When you get closer to the 5 year mark you can revisit the vow renewal idea and consider whether it is right for you. Do the ceremony because you want to stand together and renew your vows and not because you want to have a do-over wedding. Hopefully you can get past the wedding day issues and focucs on the important outcome of the day, which was that you and your husband were married. Work together to make the marriage wonderful so you can have that vow renewal one day.
I Do - Take Two Moderator

Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT / Moderator

Post #3 of 3 (1647 views)

Re: [KrissyCo] Is 5 years too soon to renew vows? [In reply to]

I couldn't agree more. The marriage and relationship is most important. The ceremony is just a dance, one that may never be perfectly coordinated.
Rebecca Black, Etiquette Consultant
Etiquette Now
http://www.etiquettenow.com