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Honoring deceased at second wedding

thelums
New User

Post #1 of 2 (4579 views)

Honoring deceased at second wedding

I am a 42-yr old widower with 3 kids ages 6, 8, & 13. My fiance was a close friend of my wife when they were in high school, and has a 6-yr old daughter who played at our house when my wife was alive. All of the children are excited about our upcoming wedding, and will be included in the ceremony. We are inviting many of my former in-laws who are still very involved in my children's lives. My wife died nearly 4 years ago from breast cancer, and my fiance and I would like to honor her in some way during the ceremony without sending any kind of a passing of the torch message, or ruining an otherwise celebratory mood.

Do you have any suggestions?

Thanks,

Dave

the_admin
Remarriage Forum Moderator / Moderator

Post #2 of 2 (4576 views)

Re: [thelums] Honoring deceased at second wedding [In reply to]

Although it is sad that you and your children have had this loss it is also wonderful to hear that you are able to move on with your lives in a healthy way and include all of the in-laws and family members.

Why not honor your children's mother during the wedding ceremony. This is certainly a time when we miss our loved ones who have passed on. I personally had a simple candle lighting service (very short) during my wedding ceremony for my mother who had passed. Here is how to peform the service:

Provide a second table at the altar or near the front of the church. On it, place a Memorial Candle in tribute to your loved ones.
Ask your officiant to include them at the beginning of the candle-lighting ceremony. For example, "Before (Bride) and (Groom) light a candle to symbolize their union, they will light a candle in honor of (Loved One), whom they dearly miss, and who they know is present with them here today."
Then, light the Memorial Candle, ask the officiant to say a prayer, then move to the altar to light your Unity Candle.

Personalized Memorial Candle Set: http://www.topweddingsites.com/shopping/product.php?p=018969

Or Try Setting Out a Memorial Bud Vase:

http://click.redgaloshes.com/click?o=03-000607&a=1508

Share a commemorative moment at your wedding ceremony by placing a flower in this memorial bud vase, printed with sentimental words honoring a loved one.
In the wedding program mention your ceremony and aknowledge the deceased parent. Personally, I wrote a short "thank you" to my mom for raising me with loving values which allowed me to grow up and to form a healthy, loving relationship.

Good luck to all of you!
I Do - Take Two Moderator