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rtread01
New User
Sep 22, 2005, 11:24 PM
Post #1 of 4
(2572 views)
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re-marriage of Baptist and Catholic
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Hello, I am very new to all of this so please bear with me. I have been dating someone for a while now and we are talking about getting married. The problem is I am Baptist, was baptized as such when I was a child, and I have been married once already. I was married by the Magistrate, not in a church and have one child from that marriage, and I was divorced and did not have an annulment. He has been married twice, and apparently both have been annulled, neither marriage was in a church. Now, since I don't know anything at all about the Catholic religion or doctrine, he wants to be married in a Catholic church this time and I am not sure if this is possible or what the religion says about this kind of situation. COuld you please help me out and give me some idea or suggestion of where I could find out if this is possible or not. Thank you so much.......
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startingover
MARRIAGE PREPARATION ADVISORS
Sep 23, 2005, 8:55 PM
Post #2 of 4
(2557 views)
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Re: [rtread01] re-marriage of Baptist and Catholic
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First, congratulations on having the courage to love again. Since you know little about the Catholic faith, you are wise to seek advice. Have a talk with a priest to get your questions answered and to find out if you will need an annulment from your previous marriage. Some pre-marriage counseling is advisible for you as a couple, since there may be issues from his and your former marriages that you both should be aware of, to know what went wrong in your former relationships so you can avoid making the same mistakes. Ask the priest about Cana programs or Engagement Encounter weekends. They are excellent!
About 40% of Catholic marriages are to non-Catholics, so your faith tradition is not a barrier at all. At our wedding, my minister and his priest did the ceremony together and it was beautiful. As a non-Catholic, you will find it helpful to understand the Church's meaning of sacramental marriage. There is great power in calling on the grace of God to support your marriage and help each other. Interchurch families can work very well, with each faith tradition adding to the richness of the other. But if you decide to become Catholic, there are classes available to guide you and lead you into full Church membership.
May God bless you.
Kay and Dennis Flowers
Authors of
Catholic Annulment, Spiritual Healing
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rtread01
New User
Sep 24, 2005, 9:41 AM
Post #3 of 4
(2554 views)
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Re: [startingover] re-marriage of Baptist and Catholic
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What is the difference between and annulment and a divorce? As far as I can see, it is the same thing only a different word is used so someone can be re-married in the Catholic church. Forgive me if I am wrong, but if someone goes into a marriage with every intention of staying married and have a child together, no less two marriages thinking "this is the one", then whatever way you slice it, you are essentially divorced. You can throw whatever word on it you want to, but it is a divorce. The marriage was consumated, had a child, had planned on being married to that person forever and then it didn't work out, hence, a divorce occurred. You cannot be married twelve years and go through a marriage and children with someone and decide you made a mistake so it can be called something other than a divorce. If you take your vows and mean them andhave every intention of being married to that person and it turns out you can't, you get divorced in the eyes of God. Also, he can't explain anything about his Catholic faith or beliefs to me, so it makes me question whether he is wanting a Catholic wedding because it is what his family wants or is telling him he should do or if he just feels he should because he was raised Catholic. I can explain to him my entire belief system and the reasons I believe what I do, but he has no clue as to why he believes what he does and can't tell me a thing about it except that he wants to be married in a Catholic church. I don't think he has a great foundational basis about his religion in the first place except knowing we can't be married if my marriage isn't annulled. Maybe there is more to it, but if you could explain some on that maybe it would help me understand it more. Thank you.....
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startingover
MARRIAGE PREPARATION ADVISORS
Sep 24, 2005, 3:01 PM
Post #4 of 4
(2548 views)
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Re: [rtread01] re-marriage of Baptist and Catholic
[In reply to]
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You are obviously an intelligent, caring person and we will try to answer your questions briefly, if not thoroughly. 
Divorce and Catholic annulment may seem the same, but there are distinct differences. A civil divorce ends a marriage union, dissolving a legal contract. Annulment states that although there was a valid contract, the marriage lacked the essential sacramental bond and therefore had no spiritual content, as God intended. Annulment dissolves nothing; in fact a legal divorce must be obtained first before the annulmen process can be initiated.
Most couples, myself included, marry with the intention of it lasting forever, but there are often issues (such as immaturity, mental illness, or hidden intentions, to name a few) that are present right from the beginning of the marriage. These issues may not surface for years, but they block the essential formation of the sacramental bond. Perhaps a talk with a priest will clear this up for you, as it's difficult to make this crystal clear in a brief post.
Since both you and your fiance have experienced the painful breakup of your former marriages, it would be advisable to get good counseling. You are wise to question why your fiance wants a Catholic wedding, if he isn't clear on what he believes or why. You both will benefit from learning what true sacramental marriage means and a good priest should be able to explain this to you.
The Catholic Church is dedicated to keeping marriage intact. There are many valuable resources available to you, such as Cana programs and Engagement Encounters. But the strongest resource you will ever have is faith in an incredible God who loves you beyond life itself.
We hope this helped answer your questions. God bless you.
Kay and Dennis Flowers
Authors of
Catholic Annulment, Spiritual Healing
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