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30th wedding anniverary - renewal of vows - confused


#1 User is offline   suzik8

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Our wedding was very simple (lack of funds) civil (lack of religious thoughts) Gown (non descript) though none of this matters with are happy and have three wonderful children, but I had always felt maybe it would have been nice to be a "bride"

We were only going to have a party, but after 30 years my husband would like us to renew our vows /bless the marriage with our local minister. I was gong to wear a nice gown, but while leaving the a shop I was browsing in, there was the dress the one I wanted to wear many years ago (Grace Kelly esque from Plain Sailing I think) decorated with tiny pearls and it fitted. All my friend and children are all saying go for it and my Husband and I are so happy.

But there's always a but - same one as 30 years ago - someoe who thinks we ar being rediculous and does not know why the minister is encouaging it. Especially when every one else is tightening the belts should have used it for a holiday or helped our children out !!!!!!!!

Can you divorce your parents when over 50!!! No seriously is it wrong to have the wedding we wanted so many years ago but for many reasons could not have ?

#2 User is offline   the_admin

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How can you be a bride when you're already married? Doesn't make sense.

I always wanted to be Miss Teen America...shrug

Just celebrate what you've got. So many would give their eye teeth to have a long lasting marriage with their soul mate. You can have a wonderful vow renewal and celebrate all of the happiness you've acquired. Look forward, not backward.

Maybe we should all listen to our parents. Life experience is worth something!
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#3 User is offline   Etiquette Now

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I agree completely. A vow renewal is not a wedding and a wife is not a bride. You were a bride before you married, even if the ceremony was not the one you wanted. But, your life is.

Please read our many posts concerning this issue. There are many. Some of them are from guests who were invited and attended "pretend weddings". You are celebrating something wonderful. It would be a shame if there were any smirks or any negativity involved.
Rebecca Black, Etiquette Consultant, Etiquette Now

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