[pondering]

Hi there,

We both have been married before. I had a civil marriage which ended in divorce. My fiancee is a catholic, had a catholic wedding which has been annuled.

For months now we have been trying to speak to the parish priest to get my civil marriage annuled, but to no avail.

I believe I have solid grounds for an annulment.

We are however in a rush and are wondering if in the meantime we could get married with a civil service and once the annulment is granted, renew our marriage vows in the Catholic Church? Please advise if this is possible.



Thanks!

[startingover]

The short answer to your last question is yes, in a way. You can get married in a civil service and when the annulment comes through, you can have your present marriage blessed by the Catholic Church. However, if the annulment is not granted, your marriage cannot be blessed by the Church and this will be detrimental to the faith of your Catholic partner.

If you are having difficulty contacting the priest about beginning the annulment process, we suggest you contact another priest or even a member of your diocesan tribunal. You can find this info online.

Please be sure you both get some quality pre-marriage counseling. This can help you avoid problems in your future marriage and help you heal from any anger or emotional baggage you may be carrying from your previous marriages.

Congratulations on finding love again. May God bless you both.

[Frieda Arpoika]

Yes, that is possible. You can "convalidate" a civil marriage later in the Church when your annulment comes through.
About getting the annulment started, just stop by the parish office and ask for an APPLICATION FOR ANNULMENT. You don't need to necessarily talk to the priest, as long as someone can give you the application packet. Fill it out as straight forward as possible. The questions are aimed at finding out what was wrong at the time of the vows that made the marriage less than a lasting covenant. If you feel you have good reasons, I can assure you that the questions in the application give you plenty of opportunity to give the background -- without you needing to talk to the priest.
Then submit it to either a priest, deacon or authorized staff person to process it. Large parishes have lay people who are authorized to do it. I am such a lay pastoral minister who handles annulments in my parish. More and more parish staffs do help with these forms since priests are often to busy. (You'll need to include notarized copies of your marriage and divorce decree.)
Good luck and God bless you!