[Tiffany13]

My father, after 31 years of marrage, wants to get remarried two months after death of his wife. The even more difficult matter is he wants to marry my mother's sister (his sister-in-law). After explaning how I feel about the situation he is waiting about 7 months to remarry. I don't agree with him wanting to remarry so soon after, and defintly don't like the fact that it is my mother's sister, whom I have never gotten along with. If anyone has advice please reply. I want to have a good relationship with him but this has been a strain on our relationship as father and daughter.

[Etiquette Now]

Dear Daughter,

Could you persuade him to seek counseling? Waiting seven months may help him make a good decision. But, to make a decision such as this so quickly after his wife's death isn't good.

Best wishes,

[the_admin]

Dear Daughter:

Was your mother sick? Did her illness last a long time? Sometimes, when a spouse or a loved one is terminally ill, we begin to grieve long before the actual death. It is not uncommon for people in this sort of situation to be able to go on and have a new relationship soon after the actual death. Plus, many times, if the sick person needs a lot of care, it is not uncommon for the people giving the care to become close. This may be the case with your father and aunt.

I'm not saying you shouldn't be concerned about your dad thinking of remarrying so soon after your mother's death but it's good for you to let him know how you feel and then step back and allow him to grieve and heal in his own way. I'm sure, as your parent, he gave his advice and then allowed you to make your own mistakes.

I think it's good to encourage him to seek counseling; it would be good for all of you. Make the suggestion and if they accept, wonderful.