50th Anniversary Vow Renewal Tips


50th anniversary renewal
photo credit: amanky via photopin cc
50th anniversary renewal
photo credit: amanky via photopin cc

Question: We are planning a simple vow renewal/marriage blessing for our parents 50th Anniversary. We are lucky that the Bishop of a neighboring Diocese, and old family friend (he officiated my wedding and my siblings) is able to come to officiate. He will be traveling about 75 miles. What is the proper etiquette for paying him for coming. We will be having it at a local restaurant and of course paying for his meal. But, I feel we need to pay him more. Just not sure of what would be proper for a Bishop.

Remarriage Expert

50 years is certainly something to be celebrated. Congrats!

Just to be clear, a blessing of the marriage is a completely different ceremony than the vow renewal so you’ll want to be sure about what ceremony you’re having. (You can read abut these ceremonies on the pages of this website from the left side of this age under ceremonies) I’d suspect that it would be a vow renewal, unless you parents never were married i the church and want the Bishop to bless their marriage in church. make sure the parents are aware of this so they can ask the Bishop for the correct ceremony.
(Also, for others who may be reading this post, since a vow renewal is not a legal or religious service, there is no need for a priest, pastor, minister or officiant, though it’s nice to have one of those if you can)

Typically, a man if the cloth sets a fee for his services. However, if he is a friend and has agreed to provide his services as a friend of the family, then including him in the dinner and festivities is expected, and generous. If you’d like to offer more, consider a donation to his church in his name. many officiants/priests/ministers won’t accept a personal cash tip The amount is really up to you. A typical amount is $75 – $100.

Please offer my sincerest Happy Anniversary wishes to your parents. I’m sure they are terrific role models for marriage.

 

Thanks for your reply. Having the Bishop there is going to be a complete surprise to my parents. They know that we are planning the vow renewal, but I didn’t tell them the Bishop was coming… We knew him as our Priest years ago, then he moved to a neighboring diocese and became a Bishop. My mom will be very surprised to see him. We are excited about celebrating this special occasion with our parents. Thanks for your suggestions.

Remarriage Expert

Ah, I see. As long as your parents know about the ceremony and are able to agree to it and make it personal for them then it’s a nice surprise. Sometimes children of the anniversary couple think it’s a nice surprise to plan the whole thing and spring it on them. But, we’ve received feedback from some couples that they were surprised, but not in a pleasant way. Sometimes couples want to plan their own ceremony and have time to write their own vows. And, in some cases, one or the other parent didn’t want the renewal at all! Al responses have to be considered.

Rebecca Black, Etiquette Consultant, Etiquette Now

Great advice! And, this is something truly to celebrate. It is also wonderful that the Bishop could attend and perform the ceremony.

FYI: you mentioned purchasing the Bishop’s dinner, which is proper. It is also proper to pay for all of your guests’ meals as well. You probably know this, but it is best to mention it anyway.

Congrats!!

Suggested Posts

Your wedding is one of the most important days of your life, so you want it to be one that not only you remember fondly but that your guests do too. To make this day all the more special you may want to consider some unusual entertainment – which has grown in popularity over the …

0 184.4k
Share
beach vow renewal dresses

Consider yourself lucky to have married the partner of your dreams, but blessed to want to reaffirm your wedding vows. If you and your spouse have made it to a significant anniversary, or you just want to have a “do-over” wedding, consider a vow renewal. Renewing wedding vows can be a touching ceremony for you …

0 184.7k
Share

Are you being stolen away to say your romantic I do’s on a beach somewhere or in a beautiful chapel somewhere private and cozy? Take a peek at these wedding gowns that are not only appropriate for second marriages but also easy to pack up for your getaway celebration. And make sure to check out …

0 185.8k
Share

Every year, it seems the prices of weddings skyrocket. Even the new trend of DIY decorations for the ceremony and reception have turned into a money-sucking venture that ends up costing much more than you ever intended. Follow these unique tips to save tons on your upcoming nuptials. Make a Budget Before you even begin …

0 184.3k
Share
Colorful Wedding Gowns

A special treat is in store today as we share some outside-the-box wedding gowns that flaunt subtle, gorgeous hues of beautiful color. Let’s take a peek, shall we? A bit of blush makes this gown pure joy for a variety of brides in all different stages of life. This bohemian number has a bit of …

0 184.4k
Share
writing vows

Couples often choose to write their own vows when planning a vow renewal ceremony–after all, you’ve been through a lot together! However, experiencing “writer’s block” is not uncommon, but there’s plenty of ideas available for getting the creative juices flowing. You may also decide to recite your original vows, or make amendments to them. Whatever …

0 184.9k
Share